I get asked this question ALL the time in coaching.
“Okay, but if this was YOUR business… what would you do?”
Cheeky!
Getting the easy way out without having to do it yourself.
There are absolutely moments where someone is paying me for my experience and I can save them a LOT of time by simply telling them what I see.
But there’s also a point where constantly answering that question can actually stop serving the client.
Because I don’t want someone to become really good at making the decisions I would make.
I want them to become really good at making their own.
And those are two completely different things.
I’ve worked with clients before who came into coaching wanting an answer for EVERYTHING.
What would you price this?
Would you send this email?
Should I launch now?
Which offer should I sell?
And underneath all of those questions was often a much bigger one:
“Can I trust myself to make the right decision?”
That’s the question I actually want to coach…
Because if every time they’re uncertain, I step in and make the decision for them, we might solve today’s problem…
…but what happens the next time I’m not in the room?
Part of coaching someone into leadership is helping them develop their own decision-making muscle.
So instead of immediately answering, sometimes I’ll turn the question back around.
“What do YOU think you should do?”
And if they say, “I don’t know,” I’ll keep going.
What are you leaning toward?
Okay… with that answer, what made you hesitant about that choice?
And when they respond with what they’re thinking, my favourite question to ask would be:
What would you choose if you knew you couldn’t get it wrong?
And suddenly the answer becomes 10x clearer to them.
And suddenly we’re not talking about what Christina would do anymore.
We’re figuring out what THEY believe.
Now, that doesn’t mean I withhold my expertise and make someone struggle through something I could answer in 30 seconds.
Sometimes I’ll absolutely say:
“Here’s what I would do, and here’s why.”
But even then, I want them to understand the thinking behind the decision rather than simply copying the decision itself.
Because the goal isn’t to create a client who can follow my instructions perfectly.
It’s to create someone who eventually doesn’t need to ask me what I would do.
To me, that’s one of the biggest signs that coaching is actually working.
They start coming to the call saying:
“Here’s what happened. Here’s what I think it means. Here’s what I’m going to do next.”
And instead of asking for permission…
They’re asking for perspective.
THAT’S a completely different person than the one who first came into the room.
So yes, give your clients answers.
Give them your strategies, experience and perspective.
But don’t accidentally become the voice in their head that has to approve every decision before they can move.
Sometimes the best answer to:
“What would you do?”
…is helping them realize they already know what they’re going to do.
You’ve got this!
