I’ve always been fascinated by how people think.
What drives them?
What motivates them?
Why do they think a certain way?
Why they act a certain way?
Why do some people dive headfirst into their goals, while others sit idly on the sidelines?
I was at Tony Robbin’s Date with Destiny a few years ago when he introduced the concept of a “Primary Question.”
It is the ONE question that repeats in your mind, over and over again throughout the day. It molds who you are and how you show up in life.
You might not even be aware that you have one! In fact, most people have no idea.
Here’s some examples of a primary question:
Am I good enough?
Who do I need to be?
How can I make this better?
What if this doesn’t work?
Is this going to be fun?
How do I be #1?
Let’s take a deeper look at one of the examples…
If your primary question is “What if this doesn’t work?” then you’re going about life, expecting things not to work. That means there is an underlying expectation of failure. So you’re always going to try to keep safe. You will always think that problems are permanent and if something fails, it’s your fault.
I see so many talented entrepreneurs get stuck with this primary question. Pulling back with very logical reasons why not to press forward, why not to risk failure and go all in.
If your primary question is “How can I make this better?” You will probably always think that things are not good enough. You will never feel content with things as is. You strive to make sure things stay perfectly the way you want them to be. You likely accomplish great things, but it comes with zero long satisfaction. The thrill of a win is lost in a quick moment of self judgment
Tony shared that the idea was to identify your old primary question and consciously choose a new, more empowering one.
Such as:
From “What if it doesn’t work?” to “How can I be appreciative of the lessons that go along the way?” or “What if this DOES work?”
Or
From “How can I make this better?” to “How can I see the positive side of things?”
A simple shift of your primary question can massively shift the trajectory of your results, but more importantly, increase your level of peace and joy in life.
Staying present in the NOW instead of focusing on your past failures or future worries.
It allows you to feel good about yourself now.
And it doesn’t matter what your primary question was in the past. What matters is what you choose to focus on now.
Your focus affects your emotions and if you feel good or bad.
Your emotions affect your actions and how you decide to move forward or pull back.
And as you know your actions impact your results or lack of results.
Take some time on the weekend to reflect… What’s your primary question?
Let me know!
